wowwikifandomcom-20200223-history
Saurfang facts
This article contains "true" facts about High Overlord Saurfang. They started after he revealed his greatness leading the Might of Kalimdor in the Gates of Ahn'Qiraj event, and expanded via the infamous Barrens chat. Facts must be Warcraft-related, must not be repeated from facts already in the list, and must use good, concise, English grammar. Incoherent, unfunny, or facts which are similar to another will be edited out. Facts must also be "appropriate" (see talk page). Abilities, attributes, and behavior *The warrior talent "Titan's Grip" was originally "Saurfang's Grip" but was changed when it was decided that dual wielding planets would be overpowered. *One day, Saurfang the Younger's soul will rip out of Frostmourne and cleave Arthas, Instantly killing him. *Chuck Norris and Saurfang once were locked into a battle, Chuck Norris fought for martial arts, Saurfang fought because he was bored, Chuck Norris is in the game, he is the NPC Outrunner Corpse, that is because he got cleaved so hard he was turned into a girl. *Saurfang's armor isn't Tier 6, that's his skin *In Reality, High Overlord Saurfang hits you with restraint, because whenever he hits full force he not only kills you, he cleaves your life in half, destroys the Twisting Nether, and cuts the Great Dark into a pizza, which he eats *Saurfang taught Demonology warlocks how to cleave. They just infused it with Shadowbolt. *If a rogue uses Shadowstep, and goes behind Saurfang, the rogue doesn't see anything. Why? Saurfang is behind the rogue after the spell. *Saurfang does not believe in god, god believes in Saurfang. *Saurfang does not use Mortal Strike because there is nothing "mortal" about Saurfang *Once Saurfang coughed when he was cleaving, the result was the creation of the fel cleave spell *Saurfang doesn't spam cleave, it's just that you can't see him use other attacks in between. *Saurfang does not use a Glyph of Cleaving because he has a Grimoirie of Cleave (aka his autobiography, which warlocks use to teach their felguards how to cleave). In fact, Saurfang doesn't read, he just Cleaves the books until they give him all their knowledge. *Jaina doesn't like Thrall; she just allied with him to keep Saurfang from soloing her town. *83 is actually Saurfang's age, not his level. *In Soviet Russia, Saurfang still cleaves you *Saurfang's first name is not really Varok, it is actually his level. *Saurfang cleaves l33tspeakers in the face. *Sludge monsters were created when Saurfang farted in a bathtub. *Saurfang once went into the Deadmines to get blackened defias leggings. He was frustrated when he only got soiled defias leggings. *Saurfang once spat into the dark portal and killed the Pit Commander on the other side *Troll Roof Stalkers are only stealthed on the roofs of Orgrimmar because they are afraid they would be Cleaved in the face for making copies of Saurfangs axe and enchanting it green *When Arthas was casting the instant kill spell, Lich King's Fury, in the Tirion's Gambit quest, he was actually just asking Saurfang to cleave in your direction. *Saurfang hails from Cleaveland. *When High Overlord Saurfang thinks it, every damned player and NPC on every server worldwide is instantly killed. Oh, and the servers go down permanently as well. Though, how he will continue to exist after that is beyond anyone's limited brainpower. *High Overlord Saurfang CAN divide by zero. *High Overlord Saurfang can tame dragons. *High Overlord Saurfang once used Whirlwind. The result is now called the Maelstrom. *High Overlord Saurfang uses the Old Gods as punching bags. *Whenever a nerf occurs, High Overlord Saurfang grows in power. *Whenever an Alliance raid attempts to kill High Overlord Saurfang, he cleaves them all in one shot, and then gives them a de-buff known as Rejection. This de-buff destroys all of the player's armor, reduces their stats to -100, and constantly gives them fatigue. It also lasts 3 hours and persists through death. *High Overlord Saurfang's level has recently been changed from 72 to 82. This is not an actual reflection of his level, but rather a more accurate update, since 82 is closer to infinity. *Saurfang was born at 13:37o'Cleave. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't mourn the loss of those close to him; he considers them lucky not to have died by his own hand. *If a tree falls in the forest, it screams from agony since Saurfang cleaved it. *Saurfang’s cleave is his auto attack *Saurfang doesn’t need a flying mount for Tempest Keep instances; they fly to him instantly as and when he wants it. *After distillation, 100% Saurfang becomes 100% Saurfang. We tried to determine the potential of the new Saurfang by running some tests. The method involves cleaving and none of our test subjects get past one shot. We hereby conclude that old Saurfang = new Saurfang = pure awesomeness. *The only reason High Overlord Saurfang does not cleave every rookie Horde death knight who comes to see Thrall is because three top death knight talents were originally named Might of Saurfang, Guile of Saurfang, and Rage of Saurfang. Blizzard had to change it because Saurfang is a modest person and cleaves anyone who dares to disagree. *High Overlord Saurfang can wield Axe of the Gronn Lords not only with just one hand but with only just one finger. *High Overlord Saurfang's Death Knight alt does not need any diseases or runes to use Obliterate. It just replaces his autoattack. *High Overlord Saurfang can move when Shade of Aran casts Flame Wreath. Unfortunately, the shade doesn't last long enough to cast it, we just have to take Saurfang's word on this. *High Overlord Saurfang can make a triple play in baseball, with only the batter and one other runner. *Arthas Menethil only killed 100 of Stratholme's 25,000 citizens, what happened to the rest? Saurfang cleaved them. *When High Overlord Saurfang uses Intimidating Shout on you, you don't just run away in fear. You awake from unconsciousness several hours later with your pants soiled, your weapon broken, and in the next zone over from where he cast it. *Once, High Overlord Saurfang became slightly angered after a stealthed gnome in Orgrimmar thought it would be funny to /spit him. Saurfang intercepted the gnome, throwing him across the globe to Blackrock Mountain, where he was eaten alive by The Beast. *High Overlord Saurfang never kills Gamon; Gamon just kills himself if Saurfang wants. *The level shown in High Overlord Saurfang's portrait is just there because his real level is not fit for mortal eyes. *Saurfang doesn't need mounts, sprints or any speed enhancement stuff; he just APPEARS. *Titan's Grip was originally planned to be named Saurfang's Grip, but Blizzard didn't want to imply he could only use two 2-handers at once, so they changed the name. *Once, out of boredom Saurfang tried to kill himself. The servers were down for a week. *Despite what many people say about him, Saurfang does not raid. The bosses die before he even shows up. *There is no Cow Level. At least, until Saurfang went there. *The Plaguelands were created when Saurfang did a /burp emote in northern Lordaeron. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't swear. Curse words are too afraid of him. *The Infinite Dragonflight aren't the ones screwing up the Caverns of Time. It is actually Saurfang in disguise. *Saurfang is in your bedroom, wearing your watch. *In a fight between Saurfang and Saurfang, Sargeras would lose. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't have a respawn timer. He doesn't need one. *Saurfang's hearthstone crits for 1337 damage. *Saurfang vendors Head of Nefarian. *Saurfang is too mighty for mere flags. When he fights in Warsong Gulch, he runs back to the Horde Base with Darnassus tied on a stick. *If High Warlord Saurfang uses something that triggers the GCD, everyone in a 50,000 yard radius gets the GCD instead. *Saurfang doesn't actually wear armor, what you see is his skin. *When High Overlord Saurfang says "It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time!", every damn player and NPC on Azeroth sits down and eats a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, except for tauren males, who start dancing. *High Overlord Saurfang can use a bow, and he uses axes as ammunition. *No one has ever seen Saurfang's angry face, because his cleave moves faster than his facial expression can change. *High Overlord Saurfang once learned Soul Link by punching a demon in the face. *High Overlord Saurfang has infinite talent points. He has spent 20. *Saurfang's Taunt is completely useless, as nothing on Azeroth is stupid enough to focus all of their attention on him. *High Overlord Saurfang is the only being in existence to have survived Tirion Fordring's Reckoning Bomb. *Saurfang once asked for Enchant Weapon - Major Intellect on his axe. No one dared ask why. *Overlord Saurfang is only afraid of one thing...Mrs. Saurfang. *Saurfang is able to play the hero class "Bard". *Saurfang needs no healers. He needs no one to tank for him. He's the one-man raid who will take Sargeras down. While sleeping and with one hand tied behind his back. *Saurfang will once, and only once kneel down to anything. It will be to loot Sargeras. You have been warned. *When Saurfang drinks Darkmoon Special Reserve, his perception of your level doesn't decrease; your level actually decreases. *Officially, High Overlord Saurfang is exalted with the Horde and the Alliance at the same time, but that's because Thrall and the Alliance Lords couldn't afford to be at war with him. Even so, he hates both sides to keep his rage bar full. * When Saurfang was level 10, he joined the queue for Warsong Gulch. When he entered, he was level 72. His first cleave cleaved the battlefield in half, his second killed both Spirit Guides, his third killed everyone else. *Any attempt to Shield Wall against Saurfang results in a broken shield and a cleaved face. *Saurfang eats gnomes and craps out cleaves. *Saurfang whistles in Darnassian. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't actually have a rage bar... instead the bar below his health is actually a new measure of power not implemented yet. The only reason it isn't implemented is because Blizzard was afraid that putting a numerical measure of Saurfang's awesomeness would cause a paradox. *Once, High Overlord Saurfang used Cleave while affected by Sweeping Strikes. The attack caused a chain reaction of attacks that slaughtered every single gnome in a 700 mile radius. *You know, it's not Kil'jaeden who Kael is trying to summon from the Sunwell. It's actually Saurfang. *In reality, Saurfang has already killed all of us. It's just that his attack is so powerful it creates an alternate universe where it seems that we are still alive. *In a base defence game, Saurfang is a tower class. *If Saurfang were your pet, he'd dismiss you. *Saurfang's rage stays at 100. *Saurfang's class is not 'Warrior', it's actually 'Saurfang'. *When High Overlord Saurfang does a push-up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the universe down. *If Saurfang killed himself everyone else would die instead. *Saurfang can kill a player in a duel before the 3 second countdown is finished. *Saurfang can swim from Kalimdor to Eastern Kingdoms in a single stroke. *High Overlord Saurfang can use Shield Bash, Shield Block, Shield Wall, Shield Slam, Spell Deflection, and Intervene all at the same time...without using a shield. *Saurfang doesn't get Mind Controlled. He gets so bored when he fights that he falls asleep and sleep walks. *Saurfang is immune to the looks change that comes with Blix's Eyesight Enhancing Romance Goggles. And your face will get cleaved if you even THINK why that's so. *If Saurfang cleaves you, you do not lose 10% durability. You will lose all your armor, and will be unable to return to your corpse because the pieces will be too far apart from each other to rez all at once. You cannot even create a new character, as the cleave has already killed any character you've ever had or ever will have. *The green glow around Saurfang’s weapon is actually a poison. When one is affected by this poison, they feel as if they were continuously being cleaved in the face until the excruciating pain causes them to commit suicide. However, no one has ever been infected with it because Saurfang’s cleaves are always fatal. *Saurfang does not have every profession; Saurfang is every profession. *Saurfang once visited Drek'Thar in Alterac Valley; the result caused the entire Alliance and Explorer's League forces to execute a full retreat. *High Overlord Saurfang's Cleave is so powerful that it can be seen from Outland by the naked eye. *High Overlord Saurfang always has a full Rage bar, because he is permanently pissed. *High Overlord Saurfang is always Out of Combat, because any opposition made against him is considered too trivial and one-sided to be considered as actual combat. *High Overlord Saurfang can never fight honourably, because every kill he makes is considered a Dishonorable Kill. *Items cannot be soulbound to High Overlord Saurfang. He has no soul. *High Overlord Saurfang collects only the heads of dragons. He eats the rest. *When High Overlord Saurfang AFK's out of a Battle Ground, YOU get the deserter buff. *"Hardcore" is a word to describe the flesh of High Overlord Saurfang. No other word has been invented so strong or descriptive enough to describe what lies beneath that entire hide. *High Overlord Saurfang wasn't killed, he feigned death because Kruul wasn't worth his time. *Blizzard once tried to nerf Saurfang but changed their mind after he murdered the programming team. *High Overlord Saurfang IS prepared. *High Overlord Saurfang always knows the EXACT location of Kranal Fiss, Stolen Silver and Mankrik's Wife. *THERE ARE NO LEGENDARY WEAPONS IN OUTLAND! Saurfang lives in Orgrimmar. *High Overlord Saurfang wasn't actually trying in Silithus. If he had been, no one else would have been able to fight. *High Overlord Saurfang is the REAL faction leader of the Horde... Thrall is just the peon who cleanses his cave and picks up the skeletons of the floor. *High Overlord Saurfang does not use weapons, armor, or any other type of equipment. What we see is just a manifestation of his absolute awesomeness. *High Overlord Saurfang is not affected by resurrection sickness since 75% of infinity is still infinity. *Saurfang gets the "Your target is dead" message any time he tries to use a skill on anyone, because if he's targeting you, you're already done for. *If Saurfang were to open a trade window with you, all your gold would instantly be sent to him. *Saurfang doesn't have crits. If he did, WoW would have many major server crashes, due to the fact that Saurfang's attacks make enough lag already. *Saurfang doesn't fall off Outland. Outland falls off Saurfang. *Saurfang overaggroed the Shade of Aran *High Overlord Saurfang is immune to Rick Roll. *High Overlord Saurfang's awesomeness is OVER 9000. *High Overlord Saurfang can kite a critter. *It is rumoured that High Overlord Saurfang has an enrage timer. The fact that we are all still alive, however, is proof that no one fighting Saurfang has yet survived long enough for said enrage to happen. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't really have a whirlwind, he is just spamming his cleave so fast that it looks like a whirlwind. *When the Lich King invaded Orgrimmar, High Overlord Saurfang killed a frostwyrm by jumping on its back and riding it like a skate board into the ground. Upon the sight of this, the rest of the undead forces fled in terror. *Overlord Saurfang can skin humanoids, mine for fish, and harvest demons. *If you can see Overlord Saurfang, Overlord Saurfang can see you. If you cannot see Overlord Saurfang, you might be seconds away from being cleaved. *Ra, Ashur, Zeus, Jupiter, Odin, Quetzalcoatl, Waaq, and other similar proper names are, in reality, aliases of the same entity. Yes, you guessed who it is. *Saurfang sees you when you're sleeping. Saurfang knows when you're awake. *When Saurfang is thinking about Cleaving someone he turns green, when Saurfang isn't thinking about Cleaving someone, he turns into a Leper Gnome. *Saurfang starred in the movie "Saturday Night Cleaver". Impossibilities *Ner'zhul didn't destroy Draenor. Saurfang just got mad and dropped his axe. *Overlord is High Overlord Saurfang's character name, as Saurfang is his class, and he gained the title "high" after drinking all the brewfest beer *The meaning of life is Saurfang. *When Saurfang /kicks or /gkicks someone, their account disappears. When he /gdisbands, the servers go down. *If you ever insult High Overlord Saurfang, he will cleave you; hunt down your ghost, cleave it; hunt down your account, cleave it; hunt you down in life, cleave you in life; and cleave every trace of your existence from the fabric of space and time. *One does not simply walk into Saurfang's house. *Chuck Norris is High Overlord Saurfang's abandoned level 1 alt. *High Overlord Saurfang knows the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything.Too bad he won't tell you. *Draenor was actually ripped apart when High Overlord Saurfang had a temper tantrum because Ner'zhul scratched his axe. *Malygos threatens to destroy all spellcasters except Saurfang. Both because he is technically not a spellcaster, and because he knows if Saurfang kills him, he won't respawn later. *Saurfang can both see and attack creatures that are out-of-phase. *One Old God can make Sargeras cry for mercy. Saurfang can make an Old God cry for mercy by unsheathing his axe. However, the last time Saurfang unsheathed his axe, the sun glinting off it turned Tanaris into a desert. *High Overlord Saurfang was the first to know that Blizzard´s secret project was Diablo III, even before Blizzard itself. *Saurfang uses the Jormungar worm as Dental floss. *High Overlord Saurfang didn't need to sign up for the Beta. *The fastest leveling record was set by Saurfang. This occurred so fast that he BROKE the limit. *Saurfang taunted Happy Fun Ball. *High Overlord Saurfang once attacked a rogue with cheat death on, the rogue still died in one hit. *If you somehow managed to polymorph Saurfang, you'd be the first person in WoW to be killed by a sheep. *The only known way to survive a Saurfang cleave is for High Overlord Saurfang to have rez sickness when he cleaves you. Too bad he can't die. *High Overlord Saurfang can fear Undead mobs. *High Overlord Saurfang can "Pop" Enrage. *Saurfang can put Cleave, Sunder Armor, Thunder Clap, and Eviscerate into one macro and use it at will, even though the last isn't even a warrior skill. This is because no rogue trainer is stupid enough to refuse to teach him. *Saurfang take candle. *Saurfang CAN cast Fireball, Flamestrike, Fire Shock, Scorch, Immolate, Rain of Fire, Blast Wave, and Dragon's Breath with his rage bar. *Saurfang CAN wield wands. They shoot cleaves. *Saurfang CAN stealth. It's just that you can't see it. *Saurfang CAN do that. Right. NOW. *The target may not be in your line of sight, but it is in that of High Overlord Saurfang. *You used to be able to drop items. Then Saurfang mentioned that he didn't like littering. *A druid tried to cast Entangling Roots on Saurfang. He pulled them out of the ground and uprooted Orgrimmar. *High Overlord Saurfang can use Spell Reflection against the use ability of Martin Thunder. *GMs have concluded that if The Unstoppable Force and The Immovable Object were to collide, there would be no survivors... except for Saurfang. *Although impossible, if you were to dodge one of High Overlord Saurfang's attacks, he'd be mildly aggravated and kill you twice on the spot. *Saurfang DOES know the location of the cow level, and beat it 42 times. *High Overlord Saurfang enchanted his High Warlord's Greataxe with Agility because he can. *Saurfang can Execute his enemy at 100% Health. Just to save him time. *High Overlord Saurfang considers "Two-Hand" to just be a suggestion for his weapon, not a requirement. *High Overlord Saurfang doesn't appear to have a mount, but look closer -- everything on the planet is standing on it. *Saurfang cannot target anything, because him concentrating on a single thing would cause massive server crashes. *Saurfang can roll a level 1 Death Knight, even before Wrath of the Lich King was released. *If someone somehow found Saurfang's TCG Card, they and anyone else who saw it would be erased from existence because Saufang's card is not fit for mortal eyes. *If Saurfang is fighting a paladin and the paladin bubble hearths, Saurfang will be at the inn waiting for them. *Tricky Treats get a tummyache when they have too much Saurfang. *One of the ghosts from the world event accidentally threatened Saurfang in Orgrimmar. "Ah, there you are. Say goodbye to those you love, Warrior." .1337 seconds later Saurfang cleaved him. Yes, the ghosts are untargetable. Yes, they have no character bar. But it died anyways. Afterwards Saurfang chuckled to himself: "Like I have anyone I love." *When an Undeath Death Knight and Saurfang dueled, the DK thought he would survive after death by transforming into a ghoul. Upon turning into a ghoul he died again. Then when he resurrected from his corpse he died again. Minutes later he tried Spirit Rezzing but he died shortly after that too. Then his ghost died. And that was the end of that. *Saurfang resists heals. Heals are for wussies. *Sargeras created the Burning Legion because he was too scared of Saurfang to confront him directly. *The only person ever capable of standing up to Saurfang for a few seconds was his brother Broxigar. Saurfang got all jealous so he made a hole in time and threw Brox back ten thousand years. Problem solved. *In the land of Azeroth, in the fires of Blackrock Depths, High Overlord Saurfang forged a Master Ring to control all others. Unfortunately Master Rings aren't all they're cracked up to be, so he threw it into a river and bought a Servant Ring instead. *The Well of Eternity didn't make the the sea...Saurfang had to pee. *The reason Atiesh is in 40 splinters is because it once told High Overlord Saurfang it was on cooldown. *High Overlord Saurfang only eats once a week, during Tuesday downtime. The result is the replinishment of Azeroth's Dark Iron Scraps, after he digests. Relations with other characters *Kil'jaeden once asked Saurfang if he wanted to help him eradicate all life. Saurfang agreed and started by killing Kil'jaeden. *Saurfang is going to Northrend to find Arthas and get his toothpick back. Arthas found it in some ruins in Northrend when we was still a paladin with his friend Muradin some years ago and he has been using it ever since. Arthas learned of Saurfang's quest and has fortified his Citadel, but since he saw this page, he has decided to offer the "toothpick" to the first players that downs him to 1%, then bubble-hearths away. The "lucky" player then becomes Saurfang's target. *Thottbot once tried to upload High Overlord Saurfang to their database. The resulting explosion created Wowhead as an accidental by-product of his awesomeness. *Saurfang the younger is level 1336 because he's not L33T enough to be level 1337. *The reason Saurfang the Younger can be killed (This task alone requires a 42 man raid group with at least 20 healers with over 2,000 healing) is cause High Overlord Saurfang has only spent 2 minutes with his son. *The only time Orgrimmar was attacked was when Saurfang went to the Caverns of Time to kill his past self. The reason he still exists is the same as why no one has seen Nozdormu in years. *Grom once dared Saurfang to surgically remove his own eye with his axe. This is why he is now known as Hellscream. *The reason Hogger is so powerful is because he has actually killed Saurfang 1337 times. Saurfang was rising his "Deaths to Hogger" stat up while desperately trying to keep his cleave under control. *Saurfang farted behind Al'Akir who was behind Ragnaros which caused a lot of Azeroth to be burnt, thus making the Burning Steppes, Searing Gorge and the Badlands *Ysera heard a rumor that Saurfang was coming for her. The Emerald Dream started becoming the Nightmare that day. *Varimathras didn't kill Balnazzar because he was still loyal to him, he only defeated him because Saurfang had dibs on him, and NOBODY CROSSES SAURFANG! *Kel'Thuzad moved to Northrend because Saurfang finally decided to kill him and destroy his phylactery. But Saurfang became aware of this and he, too, went to Northrend. *In Tales of the Past III, Arthas didn't kill Saurfang. Saurfang merely fell asleep from boredom. *When in the end of the first WotLK trailer Arthas said "in the end, all must serve the one, true king" he actually referred to Saurfang. *Kil'jaeden wasn't sucked back in by the Sunwell. When he decided to come out and send all raid members to hell, he saw Saurfang and retreated. However, he left his pendant behind to please Saurfang. *Nightbane is Saurfang's Dragon-kite. *Saurfang once cleaved Echo of Medivh in the face for cheating in a game of chess. *Archimonde lied when he said that doom had come to world. It came when Saurfang was born. *Deathwing is hiding because of Saurfang. *Saurfang stares C´thun down. *Sargeras isn't trapped in the Twisting Nether, he's just too afraid of High Overlord Saurfang to set foot on land. *Before Saurfang cleaved him, he used to be known as Cookie McAwesomelyStrongSauce. *Jaina is currently cheating on Thrall with Saurfang. Thrall knows, but is too afraid of Saurfang to say anything. *Cairne called High Overlord Saurfang crazy; the result gave him his name of "Bloodhoof". *The Four Horsemen of Naxxramas actually live in Saurfang's nut sack. *Ivus the Forest Lord Is Saurfang's firewood. *Saurfang really killed Mannoroth, while practicing his Throwing Axe skill it carved from Orgrimmar through the mountain and struck the demon in the chest. *If High Overlord Saurfang was a hunter he would tame Omen, if he was a warlock, he would enslave Doom Lord Kazzak, if he decided to go to Outland, Nefarian would be his flying mount. *Kil'Jaeden sent Illidan instead of Saurfang to destroy the Lich King because he was afraid that after Saurfang was done with the Lich King, he'd come for him next. *High Overlord Saurfang is currently suing The Lich King, claiming that The Scourge was already the trademarked name for his teeth. *Arthas was actually the Lich King's second choice... High Overlord Saurfang mocked his request. *Once High Overlord Saurfang used Hamstring on Wirt and sliced his leg off, because Wirt insisted there was no cow level. *The Horde would have gotten High Overlord Saurfang to destroy Archimonde with one blow but they were too scared to wake him up. *When Archimonde used to yell "None can stand before the Burning Legion!" he made sure not to say it too loud, in case High Overlord Saurfang took offense. *At first, Thrall considered High Overlord Saurfang to accompany him in killing Mannoroth, but Saurfang refused, claiming that Mannoroth simply wasn't worth the effort. *Once known as Screamer, he was reduced to Murmur after meeting Saurfang. *Deathwing is NOT Saurfang's epic mount. Deathwing isn't awesome enough to be worthy. *High Overlord Saurfang raised Gruul the Dragonkiller from childhood, but left him in Outland because he was disappointed with Gruul's damage. *Kael'thas is lucky that High Overlord Saurfang does not have a flying mount...yet. *The reason why Saurfang hasn't killed Kel'thuzad yet, despite him being outside Warong hold, is because he dosen't think Kel'thuzad is worthy of being cleaved. *Illidan once challenged Saurfang at a staring contest. He's been blind ever since. *Zul'jin didn't cut his arm off, he just challenged Saurfang at arm wrestling. *Edwin Vancleef's name is actually Vancleave. He was such a Saurfang-fan he adopted the name. Vancleef is just the sound Edwin makes when he tried to say his name after Saurfang had punched his teeth in. Things coming from Saurfang *The Rocket Parts on the Shimmering Flats is because Saurfang cleaved the racers. *A long time ago, gnomes could be priests and priests' bubble was no different then a paladins' bubble. This all changed one day when a gnome priest decided to go to Orgrimmar and bubblehearth in front of High Overlord Saurfang. The cleave was so powerful that the priests' bubble was reduced to what it is today, and so gnomes could no longer priests. Every gnome priest that day became a gnome mage, with soiled pants. *The Netherstorm used to be a single rock attached to Blade's Edge Mountains. That is, until Saurfang used his Cleave there. *Saurfang's favorite number is 1337. *Has anyone tried to kill Saurfang? Yes, Mankrik's wife has, though now she is known as Beaten Corpse. *Forest Trolls are really Goblins trained by Saurfang. *If Saurfang says there is no Cow Level, then there damn well better not be a Cow Level! *20% of Fel Iron is made out of bits of Saurfang's bacteria. *Kael'thas didn't create the Sunwell by emptying his vial of the Well of Eternity into, Saurfang just needed to wash up after a day of cleaving the Alliance, and that fountain was the closest thing to him. *High Overlord Saurfang once met someone who questioned his right as High Overlord. The Master's Glaive is a result of this. *Saurfang once urinated on Onyxia's Lair's front doorstep to express his disdain for her. The resulting acidic reactions turned Dustwallow Marsh from a beautiful land of rolling green hills into the dive it is today. *One day, High Overlord Saurfang decided that he wanted to play Diablo II, but with new content and better graphics. The very same day, Blizzard announced Diablo III. *Saurfang had a pet dog who ran away one day. The dog now resides in the Upper Blackrock Spire. *The dark portal was really closed because the Alliance was afraid of Saurfang. *It was actually Saurfang's pure awesomeness that corrupted the orcs, not the Burning Legion. *High Overlord Saurfang is really the person who gets First Posts, but due to a glitch a random name appears. *The Infinite Dragonflight is the result of Saurfang chewing up a nether dragon. *Frostmourne was a normal sword... that is, until Saurfang found it. *Highlord Kruul was removed from the game after Saurfang used Spell Reflection when Kruul tried using Kazzak's Assault and killed every NPC in Kalimdor. *High Overlord Saurfang once drank gasoline and pissed on a rock, thus giving birth to Supremus. *Saurfang farted over a candle, thus Ragnaros was born. *In his youth, Saurfang stepped on an ant. From this moment of contact with his awesomeness, the Silithid were born. *The destruction of Archimonde and Nordrassil at the Battle of Mount Hyjal was the result of Saurfang blowing his nose. The wisps were his boogers. *Deciding he needed a way to terrorize the Alliance without leaving Orgrimmar, Saurfang took 2 boar pelts, sewed them together, vomited into them and left the resulting mess in Elwynn Forest. 2 days later, the mess came alive, becoming the creature we now know as Hogger. *The reason Naxxramas is really getting moved has nothing to do with lore or the Wrath of the Lich King expansion. Blizzard just got tired of Saurfang's Tuesday morning solo jaunts through it, then selling all the loot, thereby crushing every server's economy. *Once, Saurfang sneezed. It's result can be seen at the center of a map of Azeroth. *Saurfang and Foror once got into an eye poking fight. There is an item called Foror's Eyepatch. Go figure. *The Sword of a Thousand Truths is actually Saurfang's toothpick. *At the end of the Third War,at the top of Mount Hyjal, Saurfang had to fart. The resulting blast destroyed Archimonde and everything in a 10 mile radius around the World Tree. *Scholomance is where Saurfang went to Nursery. *High Overlord Saurfang created Un'Goro crater by crapping in a ditch. *Saurfang is Azeroth's one true god. The Earth Mother exists because Saurfang doesn't want a bunch of cattle praying to him. *The crystal from which the Ashbringer was forged is neither a piece of a Naaru, nor an Ata'mal crystal, but a piece of Saurfang's snot that was left behind as he cleaved through the battlefields. *The Sunwell's corruption is the result of Saurfang using it as a toilet. *The progression percent on Isle of Quel'danas is not how close they are to capturing something, it's how much more they have to convince Saurfang until he allows more NPCs onto Azeroth. *Saurfang cleaved in Argus and it cut all the apples in Azeroth and Outland in half. *Blizzard is debating to remove the warrior talent Improved Cleave because Alliance raids complained it was OP. Wonder why. *The Dead Scar was created when Saurfang accidentally dropped his axe on the floor on the Sunwell Isle. He did it again in Orgrimmar, and it cleaved the canyon to Razor Hill. *Everyone knows that all the lore about the Sundering and the Well of Eternity was just a myth. The big swirly thing in the middle of the map screen was actually caused by Saurfang sitting down. That is the reason why he has to stand up all the time. That is also the reason why us humans invented the word "continents". *When Saurfang came into existence, all the big shots of WoW decided to migrate, and various landmasses and dimensions decided to break off. That's the reason why we have so many realms. But what happened to the original realm? Blizzard just decided not to put it up for us people to select, feeling that the mortality rate would shoot through the roof, and all the Spirit Healers would retire. *Once upon a time, Saurfang farted. Gnomeregan remains irradiated. *High Overlord Saurfang once said "It wasn't me! It was the one-armed troll!" — Zul'jin's arm remains severed. *High Overlord Saurfang once had a massive thirst. Afraid to put the blame on Saurfang, the Cenarion Expedition insisted that the Naga were responsible for draining the Dead Mire of its water. *There is no Cow Level. Or at least not since Saurfang was there. His awesomeness destroyed it to the point where everyone who knew of its existence was made to think it didn't exist. *Dwarves are really gnomes trained by Saurfang. *William Shatner joined the horde because he's too afraid of Saurfang to join the Alliance. *It was in fact Saurfang, not Mr. T, who created the Mohawk class. *Sargeras wasn't actually corrupted. Saurfang forced him to create the Burning Legion so he had something to kill. *Saurfang urinated in the water of Wailing Caverns and it became corrupted because the water couldn't contain that much awesomeness. *Kwee Q. Peddlefeet won't go away because Saurfang wants him to stay and annoy the crap out of everyone. *People are AFK in battlegrounds because they are scared that High Overlord Saurfang may be in the battle. *Saurfang the Younger is not really Saurfang's child. He is actually Saurfang himself, who Saurfang kidnapped as a newborn using the Caverns of Time. This has been done by Saurfang for thousands of years to grant him everlasting life. The Bronze Dragonflight still have no idea how taking his newborn self to the future does not damage his existence. *The last time Saurfang performed a cannonball, Un'Goro Crater was created. *Dalaran moved to Northrend because of High Overlord Saurfang. *The Dark Portal was known as the Sunshine Portal until Saurfang walked through it. *Saurfang was actually the Titan's chosen guardian of Azeroth; Saurfang's refusal's created the Dragon Aspects. *The Great Sundering was caused when Saurfang farted in the Caverns of Time... *Once, Saurfang took a walk from Duskwood to the Swamps of Sorrows. This is why there is no sign of life in Deadwind Pass. *Barrens Giraffes were created when Saurfang uppercut a Zhevra. *The Corrupted Ashbringer was actually forged by High Warlord Saurfang from a ballpoint pen, two chunks of granite, three copper bars, continuous spitting, and a half mug of Chen Stormstout's beer. *Raids are not epic encounters against the various supernatural denizens of Azeroth. They are actually garage sales for items Saurfang does not desire anymore. *High Overlord Saurfang secretly contrived the invasion of the Burning Legion to challenge his strength. *Area-effect target caps were implemented after Saurfang used Cleave on Stormwind and it shattered Draenor. *High Overlord Saurfang was once dared by Thrall to punch a wall in Orgrimmar. The impact created Ragefire Chasm. *High Overlord Saurfang demands 6 hours of silence for meditation every week. The result of this is Tuesday morning downtime. *Once, when High Overlord Saurfang was one-manning Ironforge, he needed more adds for a proper whirlwind. So he charged Stormwind, straight through the mountain. This created the tunnel later utilized by the gnomes when they built the Deeprun Tram. *The Horde lost the Second War because High Overlord Saurfang simply got bored. *High Overlord Saurfang used to be able to be mind controlled by Alliance players. Blizzard later changed this because Saurfang killed half of the Blizzard crew and said that he only obeyed himself. *The Light that paladins and priests pray to is actually a by-product of High Overlord Saurfang's rage. The naaru are just trinkets that High Overlord Saurfang has no use for. *Outland still exists because it's afraid to be on the same world with High Overlord Saurfang. *When Azeroth was created by titans, the order came from Saurfang. *History has shown that the ones truly in charge observe from a lesser position (usually security or military) while having a puppet in the ceremonial position of leadership. Guess who's really in charge of Orgrimmar? *Zul'Jin didn't cut off his own arm, Saurfang cut it off. It doesn't regenerate because his arm is afraid of being cut off again for trying to prove Saurfang wrong. *Thrall lost to Saurfang the Younger on purpose; he is scared of Saurfang's son. *Game Masters don't work for Blizzard, they actually work for Saurfang. *Hogger is the product of Saurfang eating too much fiber. *The Ashbringer was actually Saurfang's cigar that he didn't finish, because smoking quit Saurfang after concluding that he was bad for its health. The Alts of Saurfang *Saurfang the Younger: High Overlord Saurfang's level one Saurfang. *Chuck Norris: High Overlord Saurfang's level one warrior. *Jackie Chan: High Overlord Saurfang's level one rogue. *Master Chief: High Overlord Saurfang's level one hunter (the Arbiter is his level one threshadon pet). *Warchief Thrall: High Overlord Saurfang's level one shaman. *The Lich King: High Overlord Saurfang's level fifty-five death knight (he summons Kel'Thuzad, a level one lich, instead of a ghoul). *Jaina Proudmoore: High Overlord Saurfang's level one Mmage. *Tirion Fordring: High Overlord Saurfang's level one paladin. *Malfurion Stormrage: High Overlord Saurfang's level one druid. *Sargeras: High Overlord Saurfang's level one warlock (Kil'jaeden is his level one succubus pet). *Velen: High Overlord Saurfang's level one priest. *Darth Vader: High Overlord Saurfang's level one death knight (no one dares question how he can be one on a single server or how the death knight can wear rogue gear). *Garona: High Overlord Saurfang's level two rogue.